I’ve lived in Colorado for almost three years now, and I’m still struck by the wideness of the skies here. It’s fascinating to me that I can see all the way from the mountains in the west to the plains in the east. Even now, I keep expecting to find a skyline obstructing my view.

Back east, the skies were narrow strips of blue (or, more often, gray) directly overhead. At night, I couldn’t see the stars or the moon. Even from our apartment in New Jersey, with its panoramic view, I could see more skyscrapers than sky.

I loved the city, and I still hope to live there again someday, but I have to admit that often, it felt equally both inspiring and oppressive.

But after reading Felicia Sullivan’s memoir, The Sky Isn’t Visible From Here, I realized that my hard times in the city are a walk in Central Park compared to the difficulties she endured there - first as a child growing up in Brooklyn, and later as a young professional in Manhattan.

Her tales of working-class life in Brooklyn with a single mother who moved from job to job (and man to man) were disheartening at best, horrifying at worst. While I was shocked by the descriptions of the drug use and sex she witnessed even as a young child, I was saddened most by her increasing need to wall herself off from the people closest to her - friends, family, and her own mother - as they continually betrayed her. As I told Felicia, I wished we were back in sixth grade so that I could invite her over for dinner and a sleepover.

Likewise, her stories of professional and social life in Manhattan resonated with me as well. While copious quantities of alcohol were as far as I went, I still struggled to cope with the peaks and valleys inherent to living and working in New York - particularly in a technical field at the height of the dot-com boom (and subsequent bust). It was a time that seemed to push many people toward addictive and destructive behaviors. Some of us got off easy; and some, like Felicia, bottomed out before recovering.

The memoir is written not in strict chronological fashion. Rather, Felicia alternates between excerpts from her childhood and from her young adulthood. This juxtaposition of time periods adds both interest and suspense - at the end of each excerpt, I looked forward to the continuation of the excerpt that had come before - and kept the pace from bogging down (as I’ve found that it often does in chronologically-told histories).

While it’s heartening to me that Felicia has found a father in Gus - her mother’s former fiance, one of many people she has left behind - it’s heartbreaking to read about her relationship with her mother.  As a mother myself, I honestly can’t imagine treating a child so carelessly.  I can’t imagine being the child of such a mother - the conflicting emotions I know I would have were I in Felicia’s position.

Even so, it’s the final chapter, titled “Before Cocaine”, that makes me the saddest of all - a day spent with her mother at Coney Island in 1984.  The fun that they had together is overshadowed by Felicia’s desire to tell her mother that she loves her, but she resists, afraid that by doing so, she will spoil the closeness they’ve shared that day.  The idea that one of my children might ever be afraid to tell me that they love me is almost unfathomable.

I don’t know if Felicia’s relationship with her mother could ever be salvaged, or if the sadness of her childhood could ever be overcome, but I admire her for having the courage to write such an honest account of her pain.  I can only hope that by doing so, she has been able to make peace with her past.

To purchase your own copy of The Sky Isn’t Visible From Here, click here. 

Before I had my son, I used to say that my younger daughter was as much of a boy as I could possibly handle. She’s extremely physical - running, jumping, and climbing much more than my older daughter ever did at the same age - and she prefers to wear shoes that don’t get in her way. Thick-soled shoes are a total no-go, and even shoes with flexible soles are usually kicked off at the earliest opportunity. Apparently it’s much easier for her to scale the kitchen counters with bare feet.

Up until now, her shoes of choice have been a pair of Robeez - her “monkey shoes”, as she calls them. But Robeez are no match for wet and snowy sidewalks and grass, so choosing shoes has become a battle this winter. Plus, now that she’s three, she’s outgrowing the Robeez offerings.

I think I’ve found the perfect solution in the new line of shoes from pediped - pediped Flex. They’re rubber-soled shoes in a larger range of sizes than pediped Originals (EU 22-29/US 6-12), and while the soles are more substantial than the Originals or other soft-soled shoes, they are surprisingly flexible. That means my little monkey’s feet are protected outside, but she can still run and jump and climb with ease.

But what did she think of the shoes? When she came home from school, instead of immediately sitting down on the floor to remove her shoes and socks like she usually does, she left them on. It was only when, hours later, she decided to put on her pajamas that she took the shoes off. That’s the best indication of comfort that I could possibly expect from her, and it’s a guarantee that I’ll check out the rest of the pediped Flex line.

pediped Flex is available as of February 28 in nine styles for girls and six styles for boys.

One of my least favorite aspects of preparing for Oliver’s arrival was the influx of brightly colored plastic accoutrements that seem to go hand-in-hand with those first three years of babyhood. I had just gotten rid of nearly all of it, and now I had to start accumulating it all over again - and buy stock in Duracell.

So I was practically giddy when this Inglesina M’Home Loft Baby Rocker arrived. Not only is it sleek and modern - almost like a real piece of furniture - it’s basic black. And bonus points for the fact that it doesn’t take batteries.

Does Oliver like it? I’d tell you to ask him, but he’s sleeping peacefully as I write.

Like all Inglesina products, this rocker’s not cheap.  Retail price is $120, and it doesn’t vibrate or play Fur Elise.  But it is thoughtfully designed, both in terms of the baby’s comfort and safety and the parents’ sensibilities, and sturdily crafted too.  If you’re just starting a family and plan to have at least one more child, it’s a decent investment.

The M’Home line also includes two highchairs (the Zuma and the Club - I have to admit I’m drooling over both of them) and a combination changing/bathing station called the Spa.

Although we are typically a family of healthy eaters - meaning that we eat healthy food and a lot of it - I’ll freely admit that my personal standards go out the window (and head straight for the nearest Long John Silver’s) when I’m pregnant.

The way I see it, I can’t drink and I can’t ride my bike and toward the end I can’t even put on my shoes without contorting myself.  I deserve those Reese’s cups, dammit.

But yesterday, my third (and final) baby was born.  And back on the Reese’s cup wagon I go.

Being healthy is important to Kyle and me because we’d like to stick around for a while.  Moreover, we want to model healthy habits for our own kids so that they’ll hopefully stick around even longer than we do.  It’s all well and good to heap broccoli on your child’s plate, but you really ought to take a helping for yourself too.

Beyond the fruits and veggies, we’re taking other steps to eat even more healthfully.  I read Fast Food Nation when it came out, and I read it again recently.  Not only did those readings impress upon me the importance of avoiding the golden arches (although Kyle does take the girls as a treat after a morning of swimming), they made me think about the quality of the meat we prepare and serve at home.  We’re avowed omnivores, and I don’t see that changing anytime soon.  So it’s important for us to educate ourselves about what we’re eating and how we’re preparing it.

Colorado’s independent ranchers are disappearing.  Huge meatpacking plants (including feedyards), like the one in Greeley described in Fast Food Nation, are becoming the norm.  I like the idea of supporting the local economy by purchasing locally ranched meat.

Likewise, while we’re big patrons of the produce section, I want to branch out beyond the baby carrots and seedless green grapes.  There’s all sorts of ways to prepare produce so that we aren’t just ticking off our daily servings - we’re actually enjoying them!  Plenty of local farmers markets and fruit and vegetable picking farms offer a great way to buy fresh produce while providing an afternoon of family entertainment.

Another step we recently took, mainly out of convenience but with many added benefits, was our switch to milk delivery.  It’s more expensive, but it tastes better, lasts longer, and is locally produced without additives.

A big change that I plan to implement for myself is portion control.  Sure, I’m eating healthy foods - but I’m still probably eating too much of them at once.  I need to pay more attention to the serving sizes that I’m consuming, whether it’s labeled on the box or I’m just eyeballing what’s on my plate.

Finally, I’m kicking my soda habit that I established this pregnancy.  I’ve never been a soda drinker; we hardly ever have it around the house.  But for some reason, it’s what I’ve wanted to drink.

No more.  I’m back to water, seltzer, and a new habit - tea.  Those are my daytime drinks, because I’d rather spend my calories on something that requires a little noshing.  Much more satisfying.

So while I wouldn’t call any of these inititatives a resolution, they’re all small changes that complement our family’s current eating habits and will help us become even healthier in 2008.

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Write your own post today about how you plan to eat more healthfully in 2008, and you could win a $50 gift card to Kroger - the largest supermarket chain in the US.  Go get the details at PBN, and check out Kroger’s website while you’re at it - they’ve got some great information about choosing and preparing meats, seafood, fruits and vegetables, along with a ton of recipes that even provide nutrition information per serving!

I’ve never been really good about taking safety precautions when traveling.  As far as I’m concerned, a semi-recent oil change and a full tank of gas are more than enough preparation.

And although disaster hasn’t befallen me in years (knock wood), I’ve been risking it for far too long.

Snow comes quickly here in Colorado.  It may look merely cloudy when you head out to the grocery store, but by the time you emerge, your car - and the roads - may be covered in the white stuff.  Considering that I’ve seen cars skid onto sidewalks mere blocks from my home, I can’t truthfully say, “Well, that will never happen to ME.”

With kids in the car, it becomes even more important to be prepared.  Sure, it’s great to have a cell phone handy so that I can call my husband to request assistance, but if the roads are that bad, it’s going to take a while for him - or a tow truck - to get there.  I need a way to make sure that our temporarily disabled car is visible to others, so that they don’t skid into US.

So I’ve got Autolite Flareglo lights stashed in the console of each car.  They’re battery-operated LED flares - meaning that they last much longer than traditional flares (try 12 hours instead of just 15 minutes), much more visible (500 feet away - plenty of warning for other vehicles), and much safer.  Even if the kids take them out to play now and then, they’re still going to be ready to go and where I need them - if and when I need them.  Also, because they’re battery-operated, they’re reusable.  I really ought to stash a pack of AAA batteries with them too.

And since my husband drives quite a bit for work - sometimes up to 100 miles in a day - it’s important for him to be safe too, especially since I can’t head out to rescue him if he’s 50 miles away.  Better to have one of these inexpensive insurance policies in the console than to become a sitting duck on the shoulder of a mountain downgrade.

Whether you’re driving to the grocery store or across country, don’t take unnecessary chances.  Get your own Autolite Flareglo lights, an extra package of batteries, and be prepared.

I have a confession to make.

(How many times do I start a post like that? What do I think this is, True Confessions?)

I’m having a baby on Thursday, and I’ve got the cradle all set up next to my bed. I’ve already put the mattress pad and cradle sheet on the mattress - not because I’m proactive, but because I can’t stand to look at the mattress.

Because I’m pretty sure it’s the same mattress on which I lay when I slept in that same cradle.

It’s neat to think that my own babies will have all slept in the same cradle that I did, but it’s frankly a little gross to think that all of us have slept on the same mattress that is now more than 35 years old.

However, it gives me a great reason to encourage other mothers - especially those who are just starting their families - to check out Natural Mat.

Natural Mat is a UK-based bedding company that specializes in mattresses made from organic raw materials. They just expanded into the US last fall, both online and in baby boutiques across the country. As eco-consciousness and health concerns have become more prevalent, Natural Mat’s products fit the bill perfectly for many parents:

• Materials are non-allergenic and anti-dust mite, thanks to essential oils of lemon, lavender, and eucalyptus;
• Materials are naturally fire retardant and comply with federal regulations
• Materials are from renewal and sustainable sources

And most impressive for those of us who can’t bring ourselves to replace items that should have been replaced years ago - the materials used in Natural Mat’s products provide much better, longer lasting support than traditional materials (like foam and cotton batting).

They offer three varieties of crib mattresses: 1) The Coco Mat (shown above) - filled with a core of organic coconut fiber wrapped in lambswool; 2) The Latex Mat - filled with a core of natural latex fiber (direct from the rubber tree), also wrapped in lambswool; and 3) The Mohair Mat - filled with a core of horsetail hair wrapped in mohair fleece.

Granted, the prices of these mattresses fall into the category of “if you have to ask, you can’t afford it.” But again, if you’re like me, you’ll hang on to your Natural Mat for years, passing it down as an heirloom. And unlike my 1970s-era foam cradle mattress, these mattresses are built to last.

For more information, check out the Natural Mat website.

I have to admit up front that I feel like a bit of a fraud, reviewing a book called How to Eat Like a Hot Chick, when I am two weeks away from giving birth and thirty forty forty-five pounds heavier than usual. Sure, a guy with a fetish for pregnant women may think I’m a Hot Chick even in this state, but I’m certainly not feeling like one.

However, that’s no excuse for not starting to incorporate some positive thinking and good habits into my life. I may still be treating myself to a dish of ice cream before bed (a Hot Chick no-no), but if I have a spinach-and-hummus sandwich (a Hot Chick specialty) at lunch, I don’t feel nearly so gluttonous while enjoying my dessert later.

Written by Jodi Lipper and Cerina Vincent, this book is not about self-denial; on the contrary, it’s about knowing thyself and loving thyself enough to make fair and balanced decisions about what we put into our bodies - be it chocolate cake, spinach, or a cocktail or two. It’s not a diet book, although there’s some basic information about caloric requirements of women (hint: we need a lot less than we’re consuming). While there’s a lot of common sense guidance that we should already know - and probably do, but don’t practice it as we should - there’s also a lot of surprises that also make sense once you think about them.

For example, I’d acquired a taste for seltzer prior to this pregnancy. I drank more Canada Dry Cranberry Limelight seltzer in one day that I care to admit. Then, in my first trimester, seltzer no longer appealed (I think it was the carbonation), and I switched to Vitamin Water.

Per the Hot Chicks, seltzer = good. Vitamin Water = bad. Mostly due to the calories in Vitamin Water, and the fact that you can get those same vitamins by eating actual food that fills you up.

I was also happy to read that the Hot Chicks do not advocate frozen meals. I think frozen meals are terribly depressing, even when I used to eat them for lunch at work (instead of spending $10+ for lunch in midtown), and the meat in them is downright gross.

But the cocktail lover in me was most enamored with the chapter entitled How to Party Like a Hot Chick. If you didn’t already know that mixers - tonic, juice, all the additions that make those colorful drinkies so delicious - are packed with calories, let me burst your bubble right now. Would you rather have ONE mudslide, or a whole slab of chocolate mousse cake? I love my drinks, but I’d go for the cake in a second and have a glass of wine with it.

The book is written in a conversational tone, with a lot of inside references and acronyms that are defined at the beginning (LSE = Low Self Esteem, OWL = Overwhelmed With Life). At the risk of sounding like an old fuddy-duddy, the authors are a bit too free with the f-bombs. It’s a fuckton of this and a fuckload of that, and a lot of eating fucked up food, especially when hungover or feeling Mary Kate (another inside reference). I drop my share of f-bombs in conversation, but in writing, I think they’re most effective when used sparingly.

But I’m sure I’d have a fuckload of fun if I went out for dinner and drinks with Jodi and Cerina. And I’d feel like a Hot Chick, even at 37 weeks pregnant.

Buy your own copy of How to Eat Like a Hot Chick!

When I first asked my older daughter what she wanted Santa to bring her for Christmas, she told me, “A Webkin.” Instead, she’s already received something much cooler: Bella Sara collectible trading cards.

The cards feature detailed drawings of horses, along with what could be considered “affirmations” for the elementary-school set. Some are a little new-age for my taste, but many are worth internalizing, such as “Learn to trust in the people who care about you.” and “Have the courage to learn from your weaknesses and grow stronger.” The horses have names like Janus, Nike, and Cybele, which is far preferable to the names of other toy equines out there (I trust you know what I mean).

The cards can be used to play actual card games, or the horses pictured on the cards may be activated online (using the code on each card) and housed in a stable in the world of Bella Sara. There, girls can feed and care for their horses, play games with them, and learn more about horses in general. Although the Bella Sara site is online, there’s no interaction with other users, which makes it ideal for kids who are just beginning to learn about Internet safety.

Bella Sara was created by a Danish social worker, Gitte Odder Braendgaard. Her son enjoyed Pokemon and Magic: The Gathering cards, but her daughters showed no interest. Braendgaard conceived Bella Sara as an alternative card-based activity for girls, with a stronger focus on imagination and self-esteem and less emphasis on competition. It has become a tremendous hit in Scandinavia since its introduction in late 2005, and the cards became available nationally in the US in early 2007. Recent coverage of Bella Sara includes this NYT article, which gives more information concerning the history of the cards.

My older daughter already enjoys using the computer, particularly for playing games that have an element of continuity. Being able to keep track of her progress is a key motivator for her. So she has really enjoyed activating her horses online, where she can return to care for them and play games. We also don’t have any pets, so caring for horses online is an acceptable substitute for all of us - especially considering that we live in Colorado where many girls her age actually DO have their own horse.

I asked her about her favorite aspects of Bella Sara, and she affirmed that the online play is lots of fun for her. She loves to feed the horses and play jumping games with them. As in other collectible trading card games, there are rare cards in Bella Sara that have iridescent backgrounds. She reported that when she activated these horses online, they were placed in a different kind of stable - “more like a castle!” Interestingly, while she thinks these rare cards are pretty cool, she told me that she was disappointed that these horses’ feet never got dirty; she can’t clean the manure out of their shoes like she can with the horses in the regular stable.

If only she thought it was such fun to clean up her room, right?

The cards are geared toward the 6-12 age range, so she’s only just getting started. She’s had a great time introducing her friends to the cards and showing them her online stables. While I like to encourage her interest in solid subjects like history and science, I don’t object to her enjoyment of Bella Sara. It’s fanciful and girly, but it incorporates good messages. Not all play has to involve learning, and Bella Sara is certainly more wholesome than a lot of the activities and characters aimed at girls her age.

And even though Santa won’t be bringing her any Webkinz, she’ll find a Bella Sara plush horse on Christmas morning instead. Something tells me she won’t be disappointed.

Learn more about Bella Sara on their website, and purchase the cards on Amazon!

I have to admit that I own more children’s DVDs than I’d like.  Between that infernal Baby E=MC2 collection (you know what I mean) and everything that Pixar ever produced, I’m done with mass-marketed DVDs.

But I’ve got plenty of independently-produced DVDs too, and those are often painful, both to the eyes and the ears.  I’m reluctant to take any more chances on those either.

So I could be considered a children’s DVD skeptic.  At this point, I require proof that a DVD is worth watching before I’ll plunk my kids (and myself) down in front of it.

A Cool Mom Picks feature is pretty definitive proof, in my opinion.  And so, as part of the Parent Bloggers Network campaign for That Baby DVD, I popped it in and settled onto the sofa to enjoy the show.

Lo and behold, I did enjoy it.

Even better, my children didn’t settle onto the sofa beside me.  They twirled and danced right along with the show.

The music is wonderful.  Absolutely wonderful.  I can’t say enough about how much I actually enjoyed listening to it.  You just don’t hear that about children’s DVDs, but in this case, it’s true.

The children are darling.  What really struck me was how natural they were.  They can’t all be Oscar-winning child actors; these kids were really having a genuine good time, no acting required.  That’s one aspect of many children’s DVDs that grates on me - how obviously rehearsed the kids are.

The production is flawless.  Really.  I loved the graphics, the shots, the pacing.  Completely professional.

And my girls - especially the younger one - loved watching and listening and offering comments (especially in the beginning - “Butterflies!  In the tree!  Butterflies!  On my diapers!”).

It’s difficult to find children’s DVDs that are good entertainment for both parents and children.  That Baby DVD has done what is nearly impossible!

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Don’t believe me?  Get one yourself - at 20% off, using coupon code PBN - and give it a whirl.  If you don’t like it, there’s a money back guarantee, no questions asked.  And if the disc ever (next week, next month, next YEAR) gets scratched, return it for a replacement.  These guys really and truly stand behind their product.

Some of you may be familiar with my friend Jenn’s gaming blog, Aggroqueen. Basically, Jenn’s whole family was heavily involved in the online game World of Warcraft, and since she couldn’t beat them, she joined them.

My husband is also a WoW disciple, and now that my older daughter is reading, he has introduced her to the cult community. I’ve joked about how if she had a gaming blog like Jenn’s, it would be called Aggrotot. But while I like it that she can follow the game and understands the concepts of completing quests and exchanging currency for goods, I’m still a little put off by some of the adult themes (read: violence) in the game.

So when one of my fellow PBN bloggers was unable to try out the new Knowledge Adventure game - JumpStart World - because it’s unfortunately not Mac-compatible, I have to admit I was excited to become her stand-in. She mailed her CD to me, I received it yesterday, and it went directly from mailbox to CD-ROM drive. Other than a brief overnight respite, my daughter has been glued to the PC, and instead of killing mythical creatures, she’s completing learning games and missions. She LOVES this game.

Even more impressive, the version we received is the second grade one (she’s in kindergarten), and while she’s run into a few hurdles she couldn’t quite leap on her own, she’s (forgive the expression) kicking ass and taking names - which makes her feel like a real big shot. I honestly can’t even tell you how far she’s progressed because she won’t stop playing long enough to let me check out the game for myself, but she and my husband have already told me that we need to subscribe so that she can get more adventure packs*.

While I love that she’s taking a break from WoW, I’m even happier that she’s showing such excitement for learning. She loves going to school and loves asking me millions of questions on every topic from human anatomy to world history. We’re thrilled to encourage her natural curiosity outside the context of formal education, and JumpStart World is one more great way to do that. It’s going to be a perfect diversion for her over the upcoming holiday break, which makes it an ideal holiday gift too.

*The CD and first two adventure packs are $19.95, available for grades K-2. But if you’d rather give it a test whirl before buying, check out the free trial option instead. I’m betting you and your child will be hooked.